Every child has embarrassed their parents that the parents wanted to melt into a pool of water and disappear like a snowman on the fourth of July.
My kids have done it to me.
I know that I did it to my mom.
Its something that we share. All of us adults who enter the parenting club. There is no way around it. It is just part of the deal.
I've been debating whether or not to share my latest such embarrassment, but decided, "Hey. Why not."
It was just another Sunday in the neighborhood when Little Man and I pulled up to the grocery store jammin' to Wheels on the Bus when all of a sudden...Little Mister Assertive showed up.
You know. The kid that screams and kicks and hits until he gets what he wants.
He showed up. At the grocery store.
The moment I opened the car door he started screaming. He didn't want to sit in the cart. He didn't want to be buckled. He wanted to sit in his car seat and go "home."
Just screamed. Loudly. Without stopping. All the way through the produce. I looked around and the whole section of the store was empty. People were walking in and detouring the apples and watermelons and green beans - instead heading for the floral department.
I couldn't take him out to the car to quiet him down, because that was exactly what he wanted. Instead, I distracted him. With grapes.
The crying stopped. Things went smoothly for a bit.
Then we got to the cereal aisle. He insisted on holding a box of Special K.
Fine. Its cereal. Even if he opens the box - whatever.
I walked around to the back of the cart while he was shaking the box and rearranged. Put a few items in. Then. Then I looked at my son.
In the moment I had turned away. While he was strapped in. He had opened the box. And the bag of cereal and was eating.
And. You know what. I just let him eat. He was quiet. He was happy. It was going well.
... That was until we were leaving, and a teen bag-boy put a package of ground beef within his reach. He made a dive, got the meat, and tossed it at a woman.
Not just any woman as it turns out. A nice lady who I've met a few times that works in the same building as I do.
She looked up. Saw me. Recognized me. And said a little too sweetly, "here's you're meat."